Before We Are Off...

... to the beach, I'll share some pictures of last night's fun.

Time Heals...

... all wounds.

There is a period in my life which I don't like to look back on.

Have you ever had an event that defined you? Consumed you, body and soul? Yeah, me too.

July 25th, 1997.

I witnessed the tragic death of our 5 year old neighbor. He was in my charge, and I was to help him get his bike and bring it back across the street to our house. It all happened so quickly--one moment he was next to me, the next he was on his bike out on the busy street... and a fire truck came barreling down at 60 mph, no siren, just lights blazing.

Taylor didn't stand a chance.

I may write more about what happened, one day. I was almost hit actually.

But this post is about how far I've come since that accident. To sum up 6th and 7th grade: I was unable to function. Total fear, overwhelming anxiety, and deep solitude. I'm not sure it is healthy for an 11 year old to ponder mortality.

At the end of 6th grade my parents decided it was time to move. Being in the house right next to the accident spot took a huge toll on my mental health. There was only one house for sale in the town, and they took it. They didn't know how they were going to make the house payment, but for my sake they knew they needed to make that change.

We call it the "Healing House." It was perfect. On a corner lot, one street was a complete dead end and the other only used by residence in the neighborhood.

My mom says that on moving day I stood out in the street joyfully saying, "I'm in the middle of the street, and no one can get me!"

Since the anniversary of the accident was yesterday, and I'm in the same place that it happened 14 years ago, I've been thinking a lot about where I am now compared to where I was then. I still have anxieties with roads (I think dear friends, y'all can attest to that), but I'm able to function when next to one. I no longer cry or get upset when talking about the accident, and I feel okay with it--no deep seeded regrets.

And I have these boys that help me look to the future.

Breaking News!

We have a walking baby! I repeat, a walking baby!

Titus is a walker, and now will take the world by storm.

Nothing can stand in his way!

It took a bit for him to get balance. In fact I still don't believe he truly understands what it means to be balanced. He wiggles so much, falls down so often, I'd think he'd give the whole thing up. But he determined. And loves this new skill of his. (It is very new, within the last few days he has honed this skill.)

An Evening

Sunday was very pleasant, in all aspects. The weather was in the 80s with low humidity (a rarity for Julys in Bama), and our family time was very enjoyable.

....................................

Isaac and Eli jumped on the trampoline, laughing and playing and rolling, with hardly any confrontation.

Isaac and Titus rode around in the little Jeep and would smile and laugh at each other when going over bumps. Isaac didn't even mind that Titus was holding a water gun of his.

I messed with a fire ant hill, pouring water all over it and jabbing it with sticks. It truly never gets old.

The boys ate zucchini bread and gold fish to their hearts' content. And Titus chewed on crushed ice like a champ.

Eli and Isaac ran around to the tree fort, going up the rock wall and then down the slide. Over and over again.

I held Titus while he had a hard coughing fit. He coughed so hard he threw up. After he is done, he laid in my arms looking at the sky above. We started to sing to each other, and then make silly faces with our tongues at each other.

On my way to the house, to go in for the evening, I stepped in semi-fresh dog poop.

Masquerade!

Though we are not attending any ball in the near future, the boys the week--specifically Isaac--have been dressed up with masked faces.

Thanks to the Batman mask given to Isaac by friend Caleb, Isaac's new obsession are masks. He commissioned he Grammie (my mom) to make more masks, some for his brothers and another for his friend Will.

Titus, the superhero the can melt the hearts all that look upon him

Isaac and Will, Batman and Robin

Together in their "Batcave!"

Poolside Terror

Eli is running around the side of the pool, carrying two toys. I'm wading in the shallows, making my way towards his location.

As if in slow motion, I see him step on the side, lose his balance, skid the inside of his leg, and drop head first into the water.

I scream, "Oh no!"

And though he is only 20 feet from me, I cannot get there fast enough. He is belly up, completely submerged, except for his two arms frantically waving above the surface.

The seconds take forever to get to him, and with each step I breathlessly scream: "Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

I scoop him up, a half second before another adult tries to save him.

He comes up screaming. I hold him in my arms, get out of the pool, and make my way to our pool chairs. As I am sitting I realize that I am shaking and that my joints are sore and stiff.

Eli continues to scream and I rock him in my arms. My mom grabs a towel and dries him off, and points out the large scrape on his leg.

It takes a little bit for him to settle down. But eventually he becomes calmer. He cries, "Fall, fall, fall." And I say, "I know, you fell!" Acknowledging and talking about his fall brings him a greater peace, though he is still visibly upset. After 40 minutes of an unhappy Eli, I take him home. The removal from the pool area does the trick... along with color Gold Fish crackers.

Now if only color Gold Fish crackers can heal my nerves!

To The Carolinas We Go!

Me and Isaac (our 4 year old) had a wonderful weekend together.

Friday morning (like 2 am!) we left for South Carolina.

(On the way out the door Isaac asked, "What do I need to do?" I replied, "Go to sleep.")

What is in South Carolina that could tempt us to leave at such an early hour? My good, good friend Dana J.! She lives in the state capital with her husband and her almost 4 year old son--the husband is in graduate school, etc.

Dana and I met in 2002, when I was still in high school and she was getting ready to leave for BYU-I. She had come to Bama from Tennessee to visit a friend who had moved into our branch (small church congregation), and we had the opportunity to play volleyball together then watch the movie Charly at my home that evening. She and my father cried together!

On my first week at school, she walked into my apartment. Holy smokes, we lived in the same complex! We bonded over Souther-hood, and became close friends.

So for 2 days me and Isaac played and ate with this wonderful lil family. What fun we had! Dana and Husband Phil made tons of great food, and Isaac and Caleb played and played and played! I got to see South Carolina's capital, and just have some good old down time.

At the Edventure museum the boys explored the big dude's insides

Also learned to be anchor men

Dana J, Miss 20 Weeks Pregnant, determined to live in Charleston one day

Being firemen were these boys' heart desire!

The State Capital had lots to show. Such beautiful grounds, too!

Husband Phil showing were Civil War shrapnel hit the Capital building. Those markings are honored with bronze stars. And the boys had fun running around Strom Thurmond, who is greatly revered in South Carolina.

Prolly me and Dana J's roughest picture together. But here we are... ain't we pretty?

There are two Carolina's, no? Yes!

So, I have another dear friend that lives in the North one. Me and Isaac went and spent Sunday with Christi and her lovely family! She lives in the western part of North Carolina, so just 2 hours up the road from Dana J.

Christi and I became close friends during my first semester at BYU-I. She was a saucy Southern woman, and I loved being around her and her peacefully decorated apartment. She and Dana J were roommates, and I learned a great deal from them. Laundry, cleaning, decorating, and cooking were/are vitally important to them, and I am so grateful they let me hang around to learn.

She has two boys, one almost 4 years and the other 18 months. Isaac and the two boys played well together, and wore each other out. Batman vs. Ironman was the choice playtime.

Hmm... I wonder where 4 year old Nathan gets all his funny faces from? His papa? Yes, I do believe so.

They feed me and Isaac well.

A wonderful homemade pasta dish, and then some YUMMY doughnuts. These Krispy Kream are July's special: CheerWine! (Cheerwine is apparently a soda pop that is a favorite in the Carolinas. And believe, those doughnuts were dang good!)

It was a wonderful 3 day weekend. Isaac and I bonded, and had some good one on one time. I think I'd like to have little trips with each of my sons like this more in the future. Isaac was especially excited to have me sleep next to him. He'd wake up in the morning, roll over, and get a huge smile on his face! He is a wonderful boy, with a great temperament, and it was wonderful to solely focus on him... he gets a bit forgotten when the two little ones need a lot of care.

These two ladies mean a lot to me. As I alluded to before, they taught me a lot. But they also accepted me. And I do believe I might have been a lot to handle at that time in school, for Matt was off in Iraq and I was a lone woman with very few acquaintances. Their friendship meant a lot, and still means a great deal, to me. I hope they know that I love them.

And they gave me and Isaac stuff! Isaac got a Batman mask and a magnet tipped fishing pole from Dana in South Carolina. And Christi in North Carolina gave me their old GSP device and some very cute throw pillows. Wow, girls! We each so appreciate your gifts.

Isaac slept in his Batman mask for two nights, and had it on all the way home!

Oh, and one of the most amazing events occurred on Sunday, the last day of our trip. I saw a Subaru!! I have not seen one, ONE, the whole time I have been in the South. For 6 weeks I have been in Bama, traveling to Florida, Georgia, and the Carolinas--so it is not like I have stayed hidden from the highways. When I'm in Boise I can count upwards to 10 Subarus in 30 minutes or less... no joke. I've become partial to these cars, though Matt hates them.

Well, that was our weekend. How was yours?