I'm Here! And I Ramble!

I know, right?  Like where have I been?

Moving, unpacking, starting Isaac is school, trying to keep everyone calm and organized (including myself), attending a new ward (church congregation), enrolling in military stuff, and driving all over the place to figure out where the heck I am.

It's been a little rough.  Matt's post below is super sweet, and I do wish he was here.  But I'm learning new things about myself and my own abilities--even if the information/learning curve is like "drinking from a fire hose."

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Today I'm finally feeling like I have my head above water.  Oh sure, there's boxes to still be unpacked. Oh sure, there's really nothing on the walls.  Oh sure, the bunk-bed is still in pieces.  Oh sure, there's boxes of clothes on one side of my bed.  But there is peace in my heart--and that's what I've been praying for all week.  To stop being "mad mommy" or "stressed mommy" and just be, as Eli would but it, "You.  My mommy."

I took the boys to the beach today.  30ish minute drive ain't bad!  Ain't bad at all.  Eli and Isaac love it. Seriously love it.  They go up to their necks in the water and have a blast in the waves... makes me nervous much?  Yup!  But I try really hard not to let it show.  Titus pretty much hates it all.  He has the weird and terrified fear of sand... so the beach is his living hell.  He kind of came around towards the end, kind of.

Speaking of fear, can I just tell you mine?  Okay, I will.  The "r" word.  Roach.  I have panic attacks when I see them.  The best part of living in Idaho was to not worry about these devilish creatures.  7.5 years of dry mountain bliss!  Our new home is like 40 feet above sea level.  And it so very wet and it so very warm.  All things roaches love.  I've been trying to be brave--it's not working too well.  I can deal with worms, and snakes, and mice, and rats; but I get serious anxiety when I have to open up the door at night, for I know a roach will run across my path.  Pesticides are in my new future!!

There is also a weird funk smell going on outside.  I do believe a small animal has died under our shed. I've just decided not to go out that side of the house, and hope that it'll all be taken care of in the next day or so... how long does it take for something to decompose?

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Isaac started school Wednesday.  I rode them over with the bike, and after filling out a bit more paperwork, took him to his class.  The school system started back on the 3rd, so obviously he started late.  I had Eli and Titus with me, and little Titus was pitching a fit in my arms when I dropped Isaac off.  I got close to tears, though nothing really spilled over.

He's been doing well for the most part.  Is excited to go but wonders if he has to go everyday.  However I think it's been a little much for him--it's a full day Kindergarten (that's all that's offered out here, unlike the West where K is half day) and on day 2 he had a melt down.  During the lesson Isaac couldn't figure out how to cut a circle, started to cry, and was unresponsive for an hour afterwards.

Breaks my heart, and the teach and I have discussed putting Isaac in the "deployed parents counseling group."  So even though Matt isn't deployed, Matt is still not going to be living with us till Dec (or Thanksgiving), and we are new to the military life so we think this maybe a good place.  Isaac doesn't talk much in big groups, but he does listen.  And listening to his peers talk may help him understand his own feelings.  This school that he goes to is only K and 1st grade, so the group will all be kids around his age.

On Friday when I got the kids up I said something about getting Isaac ready for school, and Eli had a bit of a melt down.  Through tears and yelling, "Why?  Why Isaac go to school?!"  Yeah... A little rough on us all, but Eli especially.  Think there's a group for 3 year olds try to cope with their older brothers going off to school?

But this is an adjustment for me too.  "Like, so, I have to be a responsible adult now? And like, look at homework assignments?  So... we just can't play all day now?"  Where did mine and Isaac's childhood go?!

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3 weeks ago when me and the boys went up to visit Matt at Ft. Knox, I hit my bum/tail bone on the side of the pool.  It hurt BAD.  I couldn't sleep the night it happened.  I could barely do anything the next day without crying out in pain.  Guess what?  It still hurts.  Just a little buzz of a pain, but still there.

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I've been thinking about last year a lot.  Around this same time.  I was so nervous and stressed out of my mind.  Little love Eli was in surgery, August 17th, a year ago.  His last (hopefully) open-heart surgery.  He was stressed out of his mind too.  It's hard to image what a 2 year old feels waking up to so much pain and discomfort, in an environment so foreign and strange.  Poor guy.  So this beach trip was extra sweet today.  Eli really is so much fun, and I'm so happy for him.
So, yeah, I really rather have this stress of setting up a house in a new place with no husband, than sending a child off to major reconstructive heart surgery.  Hands down.

So with that perspective, let's get onto pictures!

Sketch I did for Matt of the layout of the home.

Our new comforter!  We actually haven't had one in a really long time.  Saw this and fell in love.

Sure, take a look at the mess. 

A mess.
This kitchen is amazing!  I feel like I have so much space.  That's a good indicator of how bad the kitchens have been the last 5 years.  

A mess.
Dining room table and chairs my parents let me have.  Pretty sure the governor of Alabama grew up with this set. 

A mess.
The master, turned into the boys room.

A mess.
Our lil room.  So bright and cheerful!

Isaac rocking out, and playing along to one of Matt's recorded tunes.
He loves to try and find the same sounding cords, and play the same rhythm. 

Dragons in their underwear.  I know... these crazy, beautiful boys...

We found a park!  Yes! 

Daddy time!  We love Skype.

Getting ready to go to school.

Big Kindergartner.   

The outside of the house.  I have big plans in my head of what I want to do... but seeing that it's a rental, I'm not sure what's realistic.  However don't be surprised if I try to get the land lord to let us paint some of the outside. 

Biking in the heat is a bit exhausting.  I think I'll just pick Isaac up when in the afternoons at the moment.
And yes, Titus is holding a Spiderman costume.  Mommy says to hot to wear, so I'll demand to hold bring it with me! 

Flowers the hubs had surprised delivered.  He's a pretty cool guy. 

A Few Words from Matt...

      It's weird sitting here, on my uncomfortable bed in some barracks at Ft. Knox, sharing a room with two other dudes in their early 20's, away from my wife and kids wishing there was more I could do to help them get situated in our new home and wishing I could be more of a part of their daily lives. 

      Each day, or as often as I can, I log on to our blog hoping to see a new post about our little family and their happenings.  I log on to facebook to see if Shannon has posted anything about her daily life.  And I try to call/text daily to to try and paint a picture as to what they're going through.  I do this to keep me as informed as possible as what we, as a family, are going through collectively.  Yes we are in two totally different locations, but that doesn't alter the fact that we are a family and will get through everything together.

      The life we have entered is a difficult, rewarding, different, exciting, unexpecting adventure.  We knew what we were getting into before we started.  We knew we'd be away from each other with intermittent short visits for this intial hoo-rah.  We knew we wouldn't really back together until early December.  We knew I may be deployed and actually kind of expect it to happen at some point - if it doesn't happen well then that is fantastic news.  Knowing everything we knew and now know I still miss my love Shannon and our sweet crazy boys: Isaac, Eli, and Titus; nothing will change that.

      I wish I could be around to help build the bunk bed that was completely taken apart for the move by the movers.  I wish I could take cold showers with them because water won't be turned on till Tuesday.  I wish I could help unpack boxes and find all the little things that were packed away in 'some box' that are now needed and wanted but can't be found.  I wish I could miss out on having internet access for a day or two more.  I wish I could have killed that roach that scared Shannon the first day in our new home.  I wish I could take care of the boys - read them a story, wrestle with them, play a game, or build some legos so Shannon can rest her eyes because of the exahustion and stress that comes along from moving a family without their daddy.  I wish I could be there when Isaac leaves for his first day of Kindergarden to wish him luck and tell him how proud I am of him.  I wish I could hold Shannon, Isaac, Eli, and Titus right now and tell them all, in person, that I love and appreciate each one of them and all they do to make me a better person.  I miss and love them so much.  I am indeed a lucky man to have them in my life - even if we are temporarily separated.

      I am grateful for the opportunity to serve my country, to lead the finest soldiers on earth as an Officer, and to have a stable job that provides for my family.  With everything we've been through I know we will get through this just fine.  But yup - it kinda sucks a little.  :-)

Thank you everyone for all your love and support.

      Shannon - you are the love of my life and an amazing wife, mother, and my best friend.  I miss you.  I look forward to the many years ahead we will have together.  Years that will prepare us for the eternities.  Know that you are continuously in my thoughts and prayers and I can't wait to see you again!  Give the boys love and stay positive. 

Everything will be just fine.

Thanks all!

-Matt


Before and After the 10k Ruck March.

D Co LTC, 2nd PLT, 1st SQD (CDTs: Miller, Martinez, Heater, Oh, Smith, Cornfield, Me.  Missing Wilson.  Graduation Day - July 29th, 2012

Weekends with Daddy

We spent 2 weekends in a row with Matt!  *hallelujah chorus*

I took the boys up with me one weekend, and the following Matt came down to us.   I think the next time we'll see each other is the end of August.

Our weekend up with Matt was full of fun.  There were lots of "Army Guy" things to do, along with swimming and jumping on beds.
Matt's cadets graduated that weekend, and it was fun to talk to the young men and women.  They really looked up to him and appreciated his guidance.  They also thought he was like 35 years old.  Sorry guys, 29 it is!

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Between the two visits Mr. Matt had a birthday!  

I think he's pretty special. 

1. He suspects that Jane Eyre is actually werewolf story. 

2. He's always on time.

3. He'll never grow out of Metallica and punk rock.

4. He loves our sons unconditionally.

5. He can read military war stories over and over and over and over... and over again.

6. His Scottish and British accents make me swoon.

7. He love God, and has a testimony of the gospel. 

8. He is extreamly creative.

9. His 

homemade mac-n-cheese is to die for. 

10. He knows how to spell, and is often my "spell checker."

11. His "Hey Jude" by the Beatles (piano and vocal) knocks my socks off.

12. He honors his church callings and priesthood.

13. Once he is committed, he's committed. The end.

14. He makes homemade cookies just to eat the cookie dough.

15. He loves to laugh.

16. His ability to wrestling our boys is an art form.

17. Ross is his favorite "Friends" character. 

18. He lets me jabber away about history and other non-cool topics.

19. He is extremely machanically inclined, and is always able to set up our media center without a hitch.

20. He can talk my ears off.

21. He is picky with food, but is willing to try new things--as long as there is no ketchup, mustard, and egg.

22. He is willing to do very hard and taxing things. 

23. His arms are really short.

24. He really loves and cares about family and friends.

25. His favorite automotive company is Toyota.

26. Competitive much? Yes!

27. He is smart. Yes, yes he is.

28. He wants to help and make a difference in peoples' lives. Being a good and honest leader is important to him.

29. His talents in music, particularly in guitar and vocal, are amazing! 

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And with his visit to us we had a fun time!
My parents surprised us with a free nights stay at a Hyatt Place hotel.  Awesome!
We had swimming, and playing, and wrestling.  All good things.

On Saturday we celebrated Matt's birthday (again, 29).  It's a running joke that my parents never have any candles, so we have to create elaborate number patterns to reach the person's birthday age.  I'm not sure what the equation was this year, but some how it involved two "5"s.

And the cake kind of fell apart when we were putting it together.  I said it was a "World War 2 Eastern Front" cake.  (You know, white frosting for the snow, etc.)  Isaac had a fabulous time creating a battle scene for the top!

Lax Breakfast

It's been a chillin' summer at my parents' home.
So why not have pancakes at 10:30am, with no syrup and no silverware?
And of course our main topic of discussion should be LEGO creations.

Sounds of Tinkering

11:15pm I go to bed later than I had hoped. 
I know I need rest, because my mothery-senses are tingling: *Titus' sleep is going to be off tonight*


12:45am Titus tries to join me in bed.  I pick up the half a sleep 2 year old, and lay him back down in his bed (not without a failed attempt to let him sleep with me).

5:20am Titus tries to join me in bed.  I pick up the pretty alert 2 year old, and lay him back down in his bed making I tell him that it is still bedtime.

5:55am Titus implores of me a drink.  I tell him to go back to bed, I get him a milk cup, meet him in his room, change is diaper, tuck him in, and give him his drink.

7:20 am I hear sounds of light plastics being pushed around.  I think Titus is up, getting into drawers in the kitchen.  "Titus," I say, "what are you doing?" I get no answer. 
I drag myself out of bed, stumble out of the room, look to the kitchen, and Titus isn't there.  
It is Isaac, the only one awake in the house, sitting on top of the dinning room table, digging through a huge bin of LEGOs, and creating his master pieces.

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Most of Isaac thoughts revolve around LEGO building.  This almost 6 year old--who found his first loose tooth yesterday, is starting Kindergarten in a week and a bit, and daring on the trailer bike--loves to build with LEGOs.  It is his world, and he is always innovating and creating.  If LEGOs are not in his hands, he is thinking about them, and getting inspiration from all things around him.

LEGOs are his world. 

And I'm glad he is in mine.